Zoo Weekly for the past five years has been putting together a list of the year's most disappointing Aussies ahead of Australia Day on January 26.
Mr Assange, founder of whistleblowing website WikiLeaks, has taken the dubious title in 2011 for publicly releasing thousands of classified diplomatic cables - or "dobbing".
The magazine rates Prime Minister Julia Gillard No.2 for, it says, stabbing her predecessor Kevin Rudd in the back to get a promotion.
Crying about it to the media - or "being a giant wuss" - earned Mr Rudd fifth place on the list, which put cricketing legend Shane Warne in ninth spot for "delivering a pants-googly" to English model-actress Liz Hurley instead of rescuing Australia's ailing Ashes campaign.
Other sporting personalities Zoo deemed to be showing disturbingly Un-Australian qualities included Canberra Raiders rugby league star Joel Monaghan and AFL player Brendan Fevola.
"By releasing a nude photo of his former fling Lara Bingle to a women's gossip mag, the Brisbane Lions goose caused the break-up of Aussie golden couple Lara Bingle and Michael Clarke," the magazine wrote about 14th-ranked Fevola.
"(This) caused Clarke to become a rubbish cricketer, and caused the demise of the national cricket team, and caused the value of the dollar to fall, and caused drought in Africa and caused the continuation of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict."
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